3 Ways Dads Build Self-Confidence in Kids

• It builds trust: This "scary but safe" play teaches them to trust you—and eventually, to trust themselves when taking risks.

• It teaches fairness: When you let your child win or pin you down, they feel powerful. This feeling of capability stays with them when they face challenges on their own. 

2. Dads’ Risky Play Encourages Diskarte 

A 2024 statement from the Canadian Paediatric Society confirms that "risky play" (balancing on logs, running fast, wrestling, and playfighting) is essential for a child's physical and mental health.  

Age-appropriate risky play—whether it's a toddler jumping off the bottom step or a preschooler climbing a tree—teaches your child diskarte (strategic thinking). It helps them learn the difference between a risk they choose—like climbing onto a sofa—and a real hazard, such as a sharp table edge nearby.  

Risk-taking isn't just about climbing trees; it’s about how your child learns to think when they’re playing with you. The AAP notes that fathers build mental muscles by communicating differently—often using bigger words and asking more "Who, What, Where" questions.  

According to Child Care Resources, moms and dads also approach questions in different ways. Exposing kids to these different perspectives improves their problem-solving skills.  

You can encourage this diskarte at home: 

• When they ask for help, don't fix it immediately. Ask, "What do you think we should do?"

• When they struggle with something, wait before jumping in to help. Surviving a little frustration proves they are resilient (matibay ang loob).

• Explain things differently than Mom does. This teaches them there is more than one way to solve a problem. 

3. Dads’ Jokes Train Kids to Be Resilient 

Filipino dads are famous for their jokes or pang-aasar. Sometimes it’s a corny pun, and sometimes it’s lighthearted teasing.  

A 2024 pilot study published in PLOS One found that humor is a powerful parenting tool. The researchers asked over 300 adults about their childhoods and found that those whose parents used humor were much more likely to say they had a good relationship with them. According to the study, 71.8% of people believe humor is an effective parenting tool. Here’s why: 

• It builds connection: Kids who grew up with funny parents were more likely to say their parents did a good job raising them.

• It teaches flexibility: When things get stressful, humor can help children shift gears and not get stuck in a bad mood.

• It teaches resilience: When your child can laugh at a small blunder, they recover faster and are willing to try again. 

Just remember, there’s a line between teasing and hurting feelings. The goal is to laugh with them, not at them. If you need help navigating big reactions, read these tips on handling big emotions in kids. 

How Dads’ Presence Builds Self-Confidence 

In a 2019 study, researchers followed over 300 Filipino families in Cebu from 1983 all the way to 2009 to see how fathers influence their sons. The study revealed that when sons received care as young children and stayed close to their dads as teenagers, they saw dad as a role model and became caring, confident fathers themselves. 

Child Care Resources also notes that children with supportive fathers don’t get easily frustrated and are braver in new situations. They’re also able to resist peer pressure and stand up for themselves. 

The most important way Dads can help boost their kids’ confidence is simply by being there for them. Spending just 20 minutes playing or joking with your child builds their self-confidence now and teaches them how to be strong, independent adults in the future. 

Think your dad jokes are the best? Prove it! Join the ParenTeam Moms and Dads Facebook group and tell us how you use fun and kulitan to build self-confidence in kids.